Do You Still Love Me?
by iwannagibbs
Summary: JIBBS--Jethro and Jen have a conversation in his basement. Pure fluff.


Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. Too bad.

**Do You Still Love Me?**

Jethro Gibbs' Basement 11:15 pm on a Friday night

Special Agent Jethro Gibbs is in his basement working on the boat he has been building for most of the past year. As usual he is alone. He likes it that way. At least that's what he tells himself and anyone who dares to ask. Few people do. When he hears the front door open and close and light footsteps on the floor above he knows who it is. He doesn't look up; he doesn't need to. He can sense her presence in the doorway even though she is very quiet. He can smell her; try as he might he has never been able to erase that scent from his memory banks. From this distance he can't taste her of course but he still remembers that too. No amount of bourbon or Jamaican blend has been able to wash that taste out of his mouth.

As she starts down the stairs Jethro keeps working, trying to ignore that she is coming closer. He wonders what she wants. Why can't she just call? Why does she have to be here? He keeps sanding, back and forth, back and forth until he feels her standing next to him. He stops when she reaches out and puts her small, soft hand on his bare shoulder. Briefly he closes his eyes and then he takes a deep breath.

"Hello Jen," he says warily.

"Hello Jethro," she responds as she lets her hand travel from his shoulder down his back.

He turns to face her and her hand drops to her side. "Why are you here, Jen?'

"Do you still love me Jethro?" It's just a whisper but his hearing is very good and he catches the mixture of sadness and hope in her tone.

"Yes," he says quietly looking directly into her green eyes. Eyes that he used to get lost in several times a day. 'Used to' being the operative phrase.

"Then why won't you give me, give us, another chance?" She has inched just a little closer and now her hands are reaching out to caress his chest.

Jethro gently holds her wrists to stop her and says, "Because I won't survive losing you again."

"There are never any guarantees Jethro especially in our business, you know that."

"I don't mean I'm afraid you'll die."

"Oh."

"I can't start over with you Jen and then have you decide that another assignment or another promotion is more important than me. I can't let myself be your second choice again."

Jen stands motionless and studies his face. She sees the man she loves more than her own life right in front of her but she can't reach him. She knows it's her own fault. She had betrayed his love for her and now all these years later she is paying the price. She aches to make it right; to somehow convince him she won't leave him again. To somehow make him understand and believe that there is nothing she wants more than to be with him, to be his. Leaving years ago was a calculated decision made to further her career. She can't and won't deny it. Now she has what she wanted in her career but she knows it isn't enough. Actually, she has known that for a long time but until she saw Jethro again she hadn't ever thought it would be possible to have a second chance. She had never stopped loving him but she had just assumed he had moved on and never given their relationship a second thought. Now she knows how wrong she was, how badly she underestimated his feelings for her.

"So you don't trust me is that it Jethro?"

"I trust you with my life Jen."

"But not your heart?"

"No." He wanted to but he just couldn't let it happen again. He barely survived her leaving him all those years ago. He kept getting married and having affairs but they never replaced Jenny. She was not a replacement for Shannon as some might imagine. She was a different kind of partner, a different kind of love. A love he never wanted to let go of, a love he never imagined would walk away from him.

"Jethro, even Shannon left you and yet you forgave her." She knew that was a risky statement and she said it with as much gentleness as she could. She didn't intend to sound accusing.

He never changed expression but his eyes softened just a bit. "She didn't leave me, Jen, she was taken from me. There's a difference and you know it."

Jen hung her head and sighed. "Yes, there is a big difference. I'm sorry Jethro." She looked up at him and tried to show him with her eyes how much she wanted him. In a voice that sounded more sure than she felt she asked, "What can I do to change your mind?"

She was still so close he could see her chest rise and fall with each breath. He could feel the heat from her body and he wanted so badly to reach out and touch her. He wanted to feel her silky skin beneath his fingers and feel the softness of her lips on his. It was becoming harder and harder to breathe.

"I don't know, Jen."

At least he didn't say 'nothing', so maybe there was still hope. Her fingers were itching to touch him. Something in his eyes told her he wouldn't stop her again. Slowly she reached for his hands. She drew her fingers lightly up his arms, she felt him tensing up but she kept her hands moving up and then across his shoulders and back down to his hands. She held his hands in hers and leaned into him until her lips barely touched his. He didn't kiss her back but he didn't back away either. A small victory.

When she kissed him it took every ounce of Jethro's considerable willpower not to take her in his arms and show her just exactly how much he wanted her. Just standing there feeling her hands and her mouth on him was making it very difficult for Jethro to remember why he had spent the last ten months telling her and himself, 'no'. But, he did remember. He remembered the letter she left for him in Paris. He remembered all the nights he drank himself to sleep after she left. All the self doubt and all the questions with no answers. He also remembered her hands setting fire to every inch of his body, how her mouth could reduce him to begging, how her hair felt all tangled around his fingers. He remembered how she looked when she was lying beneath him and he was tasting her and moving inside her. He remembered what she sounded like when she moaned his name as he took her to the edge of reason and then tumbled over with her. He remembered the ache in his stomach and in his heart when he kept waking up alone and knew she wasn't coming back. He had never mourned his ex-wives but he had mourned Jenny and her leaving. He had promised himself he wouldn't ever let that happen again.

But here she was, in his basement, in his personal space, touching him and telling him she loved him and she wanted another chance. What was he supposed to do? What did he want? Maybe she had changed; people do that sometimes. Was she worth the risk? Worth the pain? What if there was no more pain? What if they could have it all again?

Jen laid her left hand lightly on his face and her right hand over his heart. She leaned into him and whispered in his ear, "Do you want me to try and change your mind, Jethro?"

"More than anything."

End.


End file.
